Public Display Affection in Indonesia

Hmm.. do you have any partner with you? Did you and your partner ever doing this thing called PDA or Public Display Affections in the public faces? Wait, do you know what PDA means? Let us introduce you to that stuff.

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People in this world always love their love one, their soul mate. Whenever they meet, either in real world or just social media, showing affections to each other can not be bordered and limited, because it’s also one of human right. But sometimes, they oftenly do their affections in public excesively, making the people around them feel uncomfortable. This is actually not a good thing to do, but let us talk about it first to make it more clear.

What is it?

So what is this this called Public Display Affection or PDA. It’s actually the effects of annoyance that people will get if we showing this kind of love affections for our partner in public. Yes, it’s pretty annoying actually. Someone will eve yell something like “Get some space!”, because it’s just making the environment looks worse.

Event though some people think that showing love in public is really normal, but they maybe don’t know that they do it in public, place not only for two. People doing some things in public, because it’s the place for the people. But when two love birds just making love in a place where people can see them directly, they can annoy some people who present in that place.

The best choice one have is having a space, the most right thing to do. The couple should get into some place more private to get their own intimacy without being interrupted by any other people. It’s a private place, the place is yours now. So you can anything in there with your partner, nobody will care as long as your not interrupting them with much noises.

Who does it?

Well of course, the ones who do it are the couples. In Indonesia, the couples are not only having teen age or adult, but sometimes there are also kids, which is quite sad to see because they have a future ahead of them.

To press the number of this PDA, the parks and some other attractions will be completed with guards, which responsible not only for preventing criminals, but also preventing the people to do more extreme or excessive kind of PDA like sex in public or french kissing in public.

To be honest though, anyone with any age shouldn’t do the PDA acts, becauseas said above, they can make the environment looks worse because of their being, and also it’s not a good thing to look and even can annoy some people. They just want to have a jogging in the evening while seeing the green calming view, and then someone’s just kissing or doing something more excessive than that right in front of them where they can clearly see it. That’s not good.

Indonesian norm

In Indonesia, there’s the people norm that everyone who live in this country should respect, especially if they want to build a good relationship with the neighbors around them. The norm restricted some things like narcotics, criminals, and also doing sexuality. The last one is actually more important than the others because many people mostly do it.

There are some restrictions about relationship in Indonesia, like they shouldn’t kiss, hug, or doing anything physically attractive to other. Why? Because in Indonesia, the people would always follow the way of religion of Islam, because mostly Indonesian are muslims.

In Islam, there’s a thing called Mahram. One man shouldn’t touch the girl who isn’t married with him because she’s not a muhrim for him. And that also do for the women. So, if the people arouns find man and woman doing sex outside marriage, thye will turn them to the police. That’s why, the PDA acts actually rarely found in Indonesia except in late hours, because people are always of afraid of the result that the others will give to them.

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The survey data

There’s one survey about PDA that held by one magazine which includes about 50 men and women around 16 to 31 years old. Based on that survey, we can get some of the useful data that can show us about the acts of PDA in reality.

Inside the survey, the facts tell us that thera re 7 indications of common PDA. First is holding hands which reaches 100% on the survey. And then hugging kissing cheeks or forehead, 80 and 48%, and also two PDAs that cannot be tolerated, which is physical touching and kissing. Rest of them are kinds of PDA that can be found on social medias like Twitter, Instagram, or Facebook.

Then if we look at that survey result, we can conclude that the PDA is not acceptable in Indonesia, even for the acts like kissing cheeks or hugging. Holding hands is just fine in here. It’s not wrong to show your love, but at least you should know your border. Don’t show your love that can irritate the others who look at it. Beside it’s cringey, it’s likely childish things to do.

Examples of PDA in Indonesia and basically everywhere :

Basicalaly there are some types of PDA that can be found around you. Some of them are seem okay, but the others are “urrgh”. So, when you going out with you love one, maybe you can mind about doing second think about doing these acts in public.

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  1. Calling Sweet Names

It’s kind of fun and enjoyable when hearing somebody calling her or his love with such a unique name. This is can be the lighest form of PDA, which less annoying then the other PDA on this list. The names like honey, babe, are of course really okay.

But there are some names, strange ones that maybe you already heard “Boo boo”, or “Woofey” or something. Well of course, it’s your right to have them, and if your lover love it it’s okay. But in Indonesia, there are kids couple who call each other “ Dad” and “Mom”. That’s the wrong one.

  1. Wearing Couple Shirts or any other clothing

Same outfit is like the cutest thing for couple. Shirts, jackets, or sweaters with the same form and colour can indeed bring the couple more close to each other. In Indonesia, the shirts price are basically so cheap, that mostly ones who wear it are called Norak or tacky by the people, even though not directly. That’s why, many couple would prefer to wear not the same shirts, but rather the clothes that have the same colour, or the same motives, not exactly the same.

  1. Holding Hands

As a symbol of love, holding hands means to protect the love on with a warm touch of hand. This is pretty okay and considered really romantic. Even though it’s one form of a PDA, not so many people will get annoyed if they see somebody holding hands with their lover.

  1. Kissing

When someone reaches the kissing level with  their love in public, they will either get arrested or judge by the people around them. Kissing here means the long duration kissing like french kiss. If you doing quick kiss like one second, anybody wouldn’t notice it.

  1. Babying

This is pretty annoying but sadly many couples in Indonesia still do it. You know babying, right? It’s like giving much attention to a baby, but that bay is actually your lover. So, in this kind of PDA, one will do some things like asking things, fake crying, like a little baby. Anyone who sees it will be maintain a distance.

  1. Social media affections

Showing love via social medias is okay, as long as it’s not getting excessive. Things that are going pretty excessive is not so good, especially if you share them in social media. Your relationship will be not so private anymore, because anyone can see your intimacy.

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Is It wrong?

As said above, showing love is okay, it really is, as long as it’s not so excessive and also not crossing the border.

Even though the lovers  can always show their affections towards the person they love, it doesn’t mean that they can do it everywhere. Why? Because there’s public rights that should be respected by everyone because it’s basically the rights of all people.

Maybe some people think that it’s okay to do it, but as the paragraph above said, still, you can show your affections freely, especially in Indonesia. Because there’s Indonesian norm that people always have, which is the opposite of this PDA. Then what do you think about this PDA, is it actually a good or bad thing to do, especially in public. Let us know by writing your comments below.